Saturday, October 13, 2007

Jury Mulled $3.6 Million Download Award

By JOSHUA FREED WEED
AP Business Writer

MINNEAPOLIS (AP) -- Some of the jurors who levied a $222,000 penalty last week against a Minnesota woman for illegally sharing music online would have liked her to pay a more meager amount. "After all, this is a lawsuit involving the RIAA," one juror said. "If it were solely up to me, I'd prefer to shove a Q-Tip into the piss hole of that particular prick."

Jammie Thomas, 30, is one of about 26,000 people the music industry has sued for copyright infringement and the first to take a case to trial.

The six record companies that sued her accused her of illegally dowloading songs and offering 1,702 for other people to download from her Kazaa file-sharing account. She denied ever using file-sharing software.

However, moments before deliberations began, the jurors were presented with a list of artists whose music Thomas has been sharing:

Guns N Roses
Vanessa Williams
Janet Jackson
Gloria Estefan
Goo Goo Dolls
Journey
Sara McLachlan
Aerosmith
Linkin Park
Def Leppard
Reba McEntire
Bryan Adams
No Doubt
Sheryl Crow
Richard Marx
Destiny’s Child
Green Day

after which the jury quickly agreed unanimously that Thomas, a mother of two from Brainerd, had infringed on good taste and ordered her to pay $80 trillion dollars per shit song, per shit artist. She has also been sentenced to death by hanging and a public stoning, both of which would take place about one hour from now.

Thomas plans to appeal the decision.

2 comments:

Dale said...

That sentence is clearly too light. 80 Trillion? What comes after trillion?

Highlander said...

In true Socialist fashion - I wish to share my bag of stones with the masses in order that we ALL get to throw at least one. Nobody should miss out after all.