Think of me as your
Millionaire Matchmaker for music. There are many similarities: Like the host of that show, I am of indeterminate gender, no matter how hard you squint. The procedure my clients follow is also very much the same: you contact my offices (read:
visit my website) and ask that I hook you up with a long-term winning relationship (read:
song). After extensively studying your profile, I have determined that you'll be a perfect fit with
Nerve City's
The Armory, a mad echoey thumper which one hopes will be on his/their/its upcoming why-is-it-taking-so-fucking-long-to-come-out-I'm-about-to-pee-my-undies release.
If that suitor (read:
track) doesn't twinkle your toes, how about I fix you up with
This Land Is No Good, the electroshock-therapy-driven screamer by
Love Tan from their
Miscellaneous Night Feelings LP? My hope is to see you two walking down the aisle (of your nearest record store) in the near future. True love is never having to say "You Are Sorry."
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